1. My legs hurt. Clearly I am too, too old to clean. I need magic Cleaning Creatures. Somebody call Mr. Clean. Does he know them? That bald guy on the cleaning product bottles?
2. I’m not talking about the Brawny guy, they changed him. The Brawny guy used to be hot! Now he is all pudly looking (if you are the Brawny guy and one of My Adoring Public I am so SORRY! Perhaps you took a bad photograph! Or woke up on the wrong side of your blue ox..? It happens to the best of us…)
Anyway, THAT was a sad day for Den in the paper towel aisle!!!
3. I FOUND MONEY!!!!!!! While cleaning!
I’M USING THAT MONEY…
TO PURCHASE TACOS!!!
I also found
a. my baby book
b. poetry (read elsewhere on interwebs in vain attempt not to offend as it is slightly sweary and yet profound and of Artistic Merit)
c. tiny Australian flags
d. wonderful pre-edit lyrics in Hard Copy
e. an elementary school recorder
f. Slipper socks
g. a book of Mad Libs…..
(we’ll be having fun with this later, y’all) 😉
h. embarrassing photos of my old band, Anchorheads
i. tickets to Steamboat where Anchorheads played with people who have actual Music Careers now. Not that I don’t. Or won’t. Or can’t. Any way. I am SURE that these *ahem* GIGGING MUSICIANS are not currently in possession of
j. Aussie Flag Deely-Bobber Antannae with one Flag missing which I bought to surprise husband with for Australia day.
k. Mardi Gras beads which were acquired in a Responsible and Sober fashion. (I am not being Captain Sarcasmo here!!!)
l. Bunny Ears which are fuzzy
m. My SIGG bottle!
n. a weird ass chicken toy which I have already tweeted about
o. several Snooty Soaps
p. Two extremely special CDs
q. A pink guitar pick
r. an entire conga drum
s. a power puff girl sock
t. Pearl S. Buck’s ‘The Good Earth’
u. My Duality237 shirt with circle logo
v. a cow
w. an electric tea kettle
x. angry monster finger puppets which are green and blue, and one little lamb one that is eating grass and is crocheted or something.
y. A complicated boat toy I made from a Kinder Surprise.
z. A box full of WRITING UTENSILS!!!!
(which is ALSO pretty money!!)
Okay, ’nuff stalling 🙂
We just stopped at the most amazing place. We knew the minute we saw the Elf Shelf that it was special. Not to mention the moomoo cowcow wind chimes 🙂 Scoreza!!!
But there is always sadness in a palace of earthly delights. When covetousness hits, you must learn to restrain yourself and WALK AWAY!!! No matter HOW BAD you want the cutecute cupcake timer! Do I need anymore crap in my house?! No! No! A thousand times no!!!
So our visit with Travis Norris blessed me (here we are)…
in conclusion, the consensus on Huey and his News – great band!!!!
We have been cleaning our rooms and packing. Mike found in his room.
– The coolest pen of all time
-My watch which has been lost for like THREE YEARS
– the necklace I’m wearing
Another few things
-a postcard of Donald Roller Wilson‘s Mrs. Jenkin’s Late Night Dinner in Her Room Alone (While Out in the Hall Leading to Her Room, Her Small Friends Were Sleeping)
-some lyrics I wrote in 1997 or 1998:
(I’m slightly embarassed, but I’m going to type them anyway…)
Shimmying down the drainpipe
of your consciousness
Slipping out the back window
of your skewed mentality
Licking shrimp sauce from
the fingers of your innocence
This is a song about me
Well I went back down to
high school last night
Remembering that future
trip across the sea
This ain’t Euro Disney,
an opera, or a roller coaster
And I’m only gonna be what I will be
And I don’t give a rat’s ass
about the government
And they return the sentiment to me
They would illuminatti me
And gladly watch me bleed