1. And so it begins.
2. And not rather well.
3. I’m hoping it improves. I’m about to go try some piano-y stuff …
4. *deep dramatic sigh*
5. ps. this is a SUPER SECRET place this is on … so BE CAREFUL …. #sharplyindrawnbreath!
Tag Archive: nur ein
1. I am SILLY behind on my blog-thing-lets. And music-stuff-lets. Also my house is a mess, and I got food poisoning trying to make cookies. I cleverly neglected to tell my roommate this, and he does not read my blog (this will be the one time he does, and then he will say something about me eating raw cookie dough because I strutted around like a Superdough Eating Cookie Hero (what?!?!)). oh! that reminds me! I forgot to put up the photos of Couch Kitty and I that I took when we were trying to get the vocals done for ‘It Always Gets Better.’ I am SOOOOO forgetful!!!
2. I have:
-Blogathon coming up at the end of April.
-Nur Ein coming at the middle of April
-ongoing stuff happening with Psychotics because it’s going too well not too keep going on with it.
-stuff I really need to finish that I’m in the middle of doing for some other online friends that they’ve probably lost all hope of me ever completing. This is for like three different projects.
3. I have a million blog entries to tag. I tagged some poems in my blog with the tag “poetry” and immediately people started looking at my blog. Activity on my blog increased by a substantial amount. I started thinking “I wonder what would happen if I started including photographs and tagging and tweeting and doing lots of stuff for ALL my entries ALL the time and just really linking stuff really well and publicizing things a lot better.” I realized I may be onto something there because my content, I think, is of pretty high quality and people seem to have a good time dealing with me when forced to hang out in my Precidence. That’s not even a word, but that is how the oatmeal sprinkles, my ducklings.
4. I’m just not that much of a hat person anymore, I realized yesterday.
5. Here is a photo of fluffy’s book which I am reading. more news on that when I have finished it. I was very excited when it came in the mail:
I am really incredibly tired and should tag and link this up. So I’m going to sacrifice any further content for cool-a-bility. Which is killing me. Well, I’ve linked up. So I will now make up a word.
Florkus.
1. a RandallThing.
2. two things for Joe which are Optional but I would like to do anyway.
3. Nur Ein!
3. clean the stupid dumbdumb closet, damnit.
4. review Round Zero, although at this point whatevermonkey.
5. read and edit more bookie-book.
6. frickkin sleep, dammit.
7. attend to some semblance of personal hygiene.
8. learn to spell.
9. take the Cylon to his “dancing lessons.” (this is sort of a metaphor, but not really)
10. PRACTICE!!!! 
I am going to try to get more in touch with “The Austin Thing.”
That is what I call it. Randall talks about things that are going on all the time, as though I would just know them.
I do not, because I am a hermit. I am Out of The Loop. I do not think he realizes how much I rely on him for connectivity. I’m sure he would be fine with it though. He’s good like that. He likes to be helpful. I suppose this is why he is a good engineer. At his best, I think he is a scary engineer. This is why I need to be home-centric now. He’s probably the reason I got things done in SongFu, a couple of those close times. He’s EERILY talented.
I’m going to write about song contests though, and the “internet” thing (as I’ve also been calling it); soon, soon! Because I think that I’ve been doing the right thing with myself all along.
I don’t really know what “New Model Musician” means. Not totally. Not entirely. I could look it up in the dictionary or on the web. There’s already a label with the name, and DFTBA (the label whose forums are hosting the transplants from Too Much Awesome, the web community which my Song Fu co-competitors Mike Lombardo
(he’s got a CD out, folks… Kevin wants you to know … this …)
BY THE WAY. SAMMY MAKES THESE VIDEOS.
and Jeff MacDougall (by the way, nice slogan! 
..) founded on ning (ack!) – they absorbed the TMA community after ning went kinda “corporate.” There’s different facets to that story, but it’s nice that the people continue.
I really am glad of the Spintown blog, because right now, that’s the contest that is piquing my interest. For a while I was doing Nur Ein (I made it into 4 (which really means 5 because of Round Zero (which I blew on so don’t listen without listening to the rest of me!) rounds before I got sick … That doesn’t mean that I won’t do Songfight ever, which is where they were forum-ing about nur ein.
I have lots of ideas, of course.
For now I will finish my list. You know … at the other place. And then do some other stuff. Yeah.
These are the lyrics to my Nur Ein song for Round Three, which features Alyssa Day who I know from DFTBA / TMA (tma is moving to the DFTBA forum-thingys). Nur Ein has it’s home on the Song Fight Forums
’97
Is it done / just a dream
Under moon, stars or sun
Could you be anything?
Could I be anyone … anything
You don’t know anything
I guard my dreams silently …
You don’t know what I’m going through
And I guard them jealously
You don’t know
What I’m going through
(You don’t know why …….. I try …. and why … I lie……)
And I can’t tell you why … I try / And why I lie
*Thirteen years
A long time to fall
in ’97
When you’re heaven bound
And you look around ….
At the long way down ….
All around
a long way down
*Sometimes I look around
You’re not there on the ground
And it’s so far to fall
so far down
so far down
*You don’t know anything
I guard my dreams silently
jealously …
Is it done
Could you be anyone?
1. I am considering a return to sanity. I was thinking about just letting it all go, and drooling on myself. But I’m not going to.
2. I’m going to spend the next hour doing something I want to do.
3. Then I’m going to do some list making.
4. I will then FINISH a project. This will be finished tonight.
5. I will then FINISH writing a song.
6. I will probably figure out what to do about that song at that point. I will implement that plan tomorrow.
Tomorrow, I’m going to deal with Nur Ein and what will maybe be loose ends of my project. I hope, no. I hope it will be done when I’m done. A decisive finish that is good and clean and acceptable. I can hear it in my head. I hope it is awesome. God, I hope it is awesome.
After that, I have some rehearsals to prepare for. I can’t afford to suck on these Monday rehearsals. I also have to forward a song that I co-wrote this week to the guy I co-wrote it with. I have to get those tracks down for that so that we can have a decent demo for it. I have to learn 6 songs for one rehearsal and I don’t know how many for the other one. But I know they have at least 13 on the set-list. I also need to nail down my set list for Tuesday, and figure out if I’m going to cast.
I feel like in all of this I’ve completely forgotten that I have a solo thing that *I* wanted to do. Eventually, I’d like to book some shows.
I feel like I’m making a list now. I feel like I need a vacation. Or a nap …..
I don’t even want to talk about the state my house is in!
Now that I have established that I love myself, I’m going to go ahead and say that
I LOVE NUR EIN … and I LOVE THESE PEOPE and I think I’m going to have a REALLY good time if I can pull myself together enough to really participate. Most of this has been due to distractions and my schedule. This week I wrote what could be a really good song with some awesome angsty emotions behind it which I re-channeled into a fun little -fantasystoryconcept which was a great job. But I’m going to give a critique now. But first, a list.
1. The previous entry was written so that I could continue to insult myself in freedom and impunity like any other good american. (tongue-in-cheek)
2. The previous link I gave for my nur ein stuff wasn’t right. Here is the proper link for the blog entry
3. By the way … what I am hearing is that most of the folks REALLY know how to set up a mix. So I’m going to learn a LOT from this, which I am SUPER stoked about. There was a lot of really good song-training and deadline and networking stuff in Fu/TMA … but I think I’m going to get REALLY on the ball from these Song Fight/Nur Ein folks.
4. In closing of list 1, it is REALLY tough to FULLY enjoy these when some fool is cutting down trees with a power saw outside of the LOUDEST STUDIO IN AUSTIN and there is some weird-assed bird CAW-CAWing outside my window. *sheesh*
So, without further ado:
A LIST OF IMPROVEMENTS WHICH COULD AND MIGHT-SHOULD (later) BE MADE TO ‘STRANDED’ (my nur ein round 1 tune)
1. I need to recut the vocal track using a frickkin pop filter.
2. I need to take the time to design a REALLY good eq for myself for different situations
3. Same goes for different reverbs.
4. I could have spent more time on the pianos
5. I went a little over the top on the accessory keyboards
6. The lyrics were a bit all over the place. I think this would have been tightened up with another take. In the absence of that, I could have run the pitch things on the tips of some of the words and it woulda been fine – sounding more deliberate. This happened in my SongFu 6/Round 1 song ‘Rain‘ a little bit, which was a similar sort of song.
7. My piano chords were good though, so it would have benefitted from being played more smoothly. There were some jumpy transitions in the chorus, which I repeated thankfully from chorus-to-chorus. At least I sounded like I meant to do it that way.
8. The structure is a bit arbitrary, but I made it work.
9. I’m not really singing to the best of my ability, and am a bit warbly. I dunno. I wasn’t comfy with my voice that day. I haven’t been feeling the sexy lately … I’ll get it back sometime soon – you mark my words
QUOTES FROM FAVORITE LYRICS THUSLY FAR (the ones that spring to mind, from Billy’s Little Trip)
“Give me peace love and rock
sex love and BBQ …
I’m just a simple guy
….
I’m stranded
trying to swim back to shore while caught in the undertow”
This is my LAST MINUTE Nur Ein entry. The challenge was ‘Whispering,’ which I did … plus I mentioned whispering as well. The title was Stranded. I wrote it about being left at a space station by some jerk.
*sheesh*
It’s at the Nur Ein, website and I’m DJ Ranger Den.
STRANDED
Slide over here
you look like not going anywhere for a while
It’s an understatement that it’s cold in space
Besides your smile reminds me of the way
he used to smile
at me
You know I stare at the stars to pass the time
I try to hitch rides
Maybe work my way back to earth to
divert the attention from the situation of mine
I bide my time, station-side
well I need a little distraction
From this heartbreak, plan my revenge games
let me whisper a little irony in your ear
CH
I’m stranded / you left me stranded
All alone at the edge of space and disaster
you severed the wormhole that tied us together
put so many lightyears between you and me and forever
Now I’m stranded … I’m stranded in time
… and space
and time
Remember I didn’t even wanna come here
I like the earth on my feet, I like the breeze whispering
I like the water rushing under me
It’s out here that I feel like I’m drowning
In a sea of uncertainty
and I’m not where I want to be
Remember that night, when you lied
were you just passing through while I planning our lives
what’s the hell’s the matter with you?
You know I’ve waited for you … for many triple moons
You don’t even remember what that means, do you?
I wish you could see how it’s been
here at the end of the universe waiting at some restaurant
staring at a check that’s never ever gonna get picked up
while you blast off,
by yourself … with who-knows-what
into oblivion!
CH …
While I’m stranded
I have made it into Nur Ein. It’s put on by the people over at Song Fight. I’m listening to it right now. The first few songs are already better than mine right now. This doesn’t bode well! The songs are all here
I’ve heard nothing but good production so far. It’s pretty good. I’m really not up to par for this one. I’m glad it’s the first (zero) round because my song is NOT good enough. I’m going to have to bring it next round. I believe that since there are not enough people, I’m going to get through and we all do the One Round.
Admittedly, I think my lyrics were good (or at least indicative of my style), but my delivery and playing and engineering lacked this round. It was basically a glorified improv. Good ideas, but not really real tight. But this contest … I’m COMPLETELY STOKED.
It’s funny, because Spintown (who is awesome) has issue with my lyrics but usually likes things I don’t like so much! I’ll have to keep that in mind when I get to my Travis-oriented things that are on my list of things to do.
I have a rap name too for myself. I picked it out! I’m DJ Ranger Den. The Den thing is sort of my nod to Joe. It’s his name for me. He had a crazy week. So Joe, you can have props in my nickname. There you go!
[ADDENDUM!]
Here are the lyrics to the tune
‘TIME TO PANIC‘
Could there be possibilities
seeded from dualities
sick needs
from lines I read between
You’re not convinced, I see
lick fingers one two three four five
quick tricky fight to stay alive
spin destiny real tightly
CH
Wrath and sloth and pride and greed
and lust and envy, gluttony
Up down, in out / and sideways, manic
tie me up and there’s no time
to panic
baptisms in infamy
won’t make this broken mirror lucky
so lead me up the stairway
to your eight nine then eleven twelve thirteen
i fall dangerously and need
your deadly sins all over me
be the one who’s down below
the angel of the 66th row
add three, I don’t care
make it make-believe I’m still there
practice underwater breathing
wear your heart upon my sleeve
CH/BR
crunch time, time to cut the wire
chaos suicide it’s blastoff time
10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
ground zero blast off time
no panic time the games not mine
five four three two one and now
ground zero / you’re down below
CH
I am about to clean my house and cut a song. I will be doing both these things at the same time. It is like a cathartic thing. The song needs to be done by tomorrow. I am hoping to have things substantially nice around here by the time we go out of town. We’re going to a major cigar event and I’d like to have my other blog out of obscurity and up and running, as well as the twittering I never really do from my cigar-related place. That’s a part of my life I haven’t been able to relax into, and it feeds a social part of me that I’ve really been ignoring. The going to Ruta Maya/Habana House part and writing a review. I used to multi-task a lot better than this. I used to not be so bogged down in work that I couldn’t really follow through on and finish.
It’s all about lists, I think. And mine has gotten away from me too fast, and too big. I want to do everything, and in order to do that, you need a lot of help. I am not a big enough person to tackle all of that in the right order; to know how to do it. So I need to stick to my original plan, and remember why I do the things I do in the first place. Luckily I am a pack rat, and I remember exactly where I put the last bookmark. It’s like I imagine a sewing or knitting mistake to be. Unravelling something. I don’t really know, but it seems both tedious and rewarding at the same go. It’s conducive to getting me back into being happy alone and oblivious.
Any interest I got from people (small though it was) really shocked the hell out of me. It’s shocked me both online and locally with people who become my friends. I don’t do compliments well, although I crave them as I crave love and attention (even though I fear it and need my solitude). If I could shield myself from all people somehow (AND still get the exposure needed to grow a profitable music career that would sustain me and my family + allow me to practice and create + be desirable as a collaborator); if I could be veryAlone and not get lonely … if I could pick and choose my times and not alienate …
well, that would be selfish, wouldn’t it? Yes. Selfish. But I am a selfish creature. I love the humans but I do not play well with them and I like my cave and I sit in it and I want to be veryvery alone. But it’s LONELY there. So I am always Not Okay. Unless I am at the piano. Then I do not think of anything. Everything dissipates. And my attention is caught again if something is shined at me (usually a discussion of something I love. like a piano. or something related to this thing I love).
I think about this online endeavour and my goals for it. I never do anything without thought for how it fits into what I do musically. I’ve always been goal oriented, I used to be this way about writing, now it’s wrapped up into the both things. But online is awkward for me. I met my husband online, yes, so I’m not incredulous about it.
But it is so much easier to be whoever you want (or not) online. It’s made it easier for me to hide myself away. I can really focus on being the queen-bee of vague. I did it in Song Fu rather well. Song Fu is really a personal story of what I went through physically as a woman, dealing with songwriting challenges and personal feelings about coming out of one mental transition into another. Moving from one group of persons to another. Hopes and dreams and fears and feelings. I put it all on the line. And now it’s time for me to make another “album” of sorts where I start revealing other things. Or maybe mixing the things I reveal with a more streamlined, professional approach into the working process.
We’ll see how that goes. I already know that it sounds very … different in my head and I have already started bringing in characters who are not me to supplement my experiences in the songs. So if you start hearing far-fetched things in my music … now you will know – why.
And at this point, after the rain-stormy horrible-but-wonderful mistakes I made in this me-scented-charade…. why wouldn’t I?
