1. I’m writing the novel in one month thing. I tried to do it before, but in reality, I didn’t. I’m doing it this time. Yep.
2. My characters already want to take over and drive the story. It’s going to be hard to steer this ship. I don’t know what will happen.
3. I started a bit late because of stuff and things and so I decided to put Ketchup on the problem and do 6000 words today. I realized at 4000 that 3000 words is actually quite a lot and that 6000 was going to be a whole bunch of book and at least 2-5 scenes, perhaps more. It kept me busy most of the day because I’m not “just write”-ing. If I let myself just write my story will just write itself and I don’t know what I will end up with because when I just write something else comes out of my fingers that I didn’t decide on.
4. I know that’s weird. Also, it’s ALWAYS autobiographical.
5. I can’t recall whether or not I’ve eaten today. Never a good sign. If I’m going to do this, I have to do it right or not at all. I’m done for now and also not doing it tomorrow if I can’t behave myself. Then I’ll have to get to 10,000 and that’s a whole lot of words!
1. today I am feeling a little blue, because I have been sick and I don’t understand it. Things I don’t understand and can’t control make me frustrated. So I wore blue and did some writing and went around in my underdrawers (#tmi) and socks and coffee (I drank the coffee, I didn’t wear it) but did NOT answer the door when strangers came. I indulged in the privacy of my own homeostasis. It was grand. I feel better.
2. I require noodles now. I think I’ll make them. With butter. Just a little butter. I haven’t been eating well. I could use some vegetables but we’ll cross that broccoli when we cucumber it.
3. Somebody help me.
4. I have projects. Rest assured, stuff is a’happening. Like exciting stuff. I’m purchasing props and stuff. Yes. Props. Isn’t THAT some exciting teaser-ly information!?
5. I’m happy to report that my breath has improved a great deal. I flossed last night like no one has flossed in many a year. I had the freshest breath in the entire nation. I’m going to do it again tonight. I am going to engage in proper dental hygiene every day for an entire week in an effort to become a proper grown up human before I turn 40. It’s the little things, I feel, that make us stronger. I might be REALLY turning you folks off right now, but it’s important to make small-assed goals and not bite off more than we can choo-choo.
1. I haven’t been well. I had to go to the hospital last night for chest pains and this was NOT a good time for that because I am in the middle of some C R A Z Y interpersonal crap right now that is dramatic-only-to-me. One of those situations where something is waaaaaay more significant to you (who is me) because inside your (who is my) skull you (etc) are the goddess of your (zzzz) own little universe. Like when The Royal Third-Person-in-this has a crush on a celebrity and sees they died on-screen or they’re having a perfect child with a gorgeous model or something. They Royal Me’s clock is t-i-c-k-i-n-g and so All-of-the-Us-es go home and eat all of the chocolate in the entire univers….
2. ker-SCHMACK! AHEM!
3. well. That was very unhealthy, wasn’t it. Anyway. Femme-femme-la-dramatics wasn’t why I was in the hospital.
4. My breath could really, really improve. I think I should floss more. I have become a really unsexy creature.
5. $hi! don’t judge me! It’s not like I NEVER floss or take showers! GAH! I just need to get my priorities straight. The other evening I noticed that I had a gnat encircling my head, like Pigpen on the Peanuts cartoons. I thought daaaaaamn girl…. you have REALLY let yourself go………. it was like that time in college when I let my trunk rot out because I was depressed and couldn’t be bothered to take whatever died out of it. That, is depression. The inability to lift the fork up to your mouth that has the food on it and starving to death. Everyone calls your Death By Apathy a suicide and doesn’t call it depression and mention starvation. They think how could she!? Didn’t she know people cared?!? What about GOD!?!?!?
6. My chest hurts. Anyway. That’s why I was in the hospital. I thought that I was having a heart attack. I was in a great mood, but I had stayed up all night writing and doing work and was in a good mood and had written emails and hit “send” on the last one I wrote which was nice and then my chest ripped in half. I knew it was not just something dumb so I woke Mike up and said “we need to go now.”
7. I ended up thinking it was something gastronomical but I didn’t want to be the girl who went home after thinking it was just something flurpy and then dies in her sleep. They laughed when I said that. So now I have to go to a cardiologist. I’m one-upping this. I’m going back to martial arts. Because exercise is boring unless it’s hard core(ing).
8. I could really, really, REALLY use a time machine. I think the time machine should go to the person who doesn’t need it though, really. Because I’d probably just screw up again, but in the past.
9. The mosquitoes are out of control. Also I think I avoid things sometimes when I don’t know what to do about stuff.
1. Deal with WordPressissuedammit
2. Stop sneaking out with candy
3. Wash clothes.
4. Clean ears.
5. ReRecord Everything
6. Throw away most of my Evernotes. Into the lava of mt. doom.
8. Eat salad.
9. Go back on Internet. Keep tweeting into the vast silence that is the void of the blackness that is Social Media
10. Retag everything I wrote ever.
11. Create Charming Videos in which I bother to brush hair.
12. here is an orange. It’s not a Pumpkin but it tried, okay?
1. I ate cake. Red velvet. I think I have a carbohydrate intolerance, but I did not finish it.
2. I’m changing when I take my pills again in hopes they’ll Work. My sleeping pill which I hardly ever take but need to tonight gives me skunky breath.
3. I think I’ll start feeling more alluring in general in the coming weeks. I’ve been antacid level sexy for months now. this will change and possibly soar up to breath mint sexy, or cream cheese sexy. Maybe fizzy drink sexy. There’s hope there.
4. No more candy crush or that game where the horses fall from the puffy clouds into meat grinders below.
5. More water tomorrow.
6. My new shoes are pleasing me and still feel new.
7. I want to be in a better place. I need more out of life than to float by like this.
8. That baby (my niece) is so cute that dryads are singing songs about her (not the same dryads that sabotaged our Internet at the previous house we lived in).
9. Redirection on my projects tomorrow.
10. This is my official reminder to practice. It’s all about motivation and being motivated helps I think.
1. I have a yeti. He lives in my stomach. Both the yeti and I have decided I should go on living, and there’s peanut butter in my pantry. There’s underwear and pants here somewhere.
2. Don’t be alarmed, I decided to live long ago. I’ve been pleased with this decision for a while and only privately question it occasionally with the aid of qualified Health Professionals.
3. It’s cool.
4. I don’t mean to trivialize things, but it’s how I deal.
5. I showered a few days ago, so that can wait.
6. I have a tattoo of five cranes on my wrist. That means I only have to do five things today. These are they: (them?/those?/ka-thossle?/thissa-lé?/thor?)
a. Find underdrawrers
b. also caffeine. Preferably coffee, but a Bullet of Mountain Crack will Dew.
c. look at lists of things to do and salvage it into prioritize-y chunks.
d. do absolutely no Internet stalking or obsessing of things I cannot control and read a book. Also eat. Something healthy, which is overachievy so stealing a pop tart would count for fulfillment of this Particular Item.
e. do some filing of random note files strewn about intelli-phones so I can find little things I wrote later and do actual stuff with them at Non-Psycho moment in Shiny Bright Future time of my choosing.
f. go to writer’s group thingy later tonight (this involves putting on more items of clothing besides underwear).
that’s extra. also maybe I’ll eat spaghetti or buttery noodles or ramen or a peanut butter sand-which or a piece of cheese.
Tomorrow I’ll practice and write something. I haven’t made anything good or smart or tasty or aromatic in several days. I helped a friend but am not sure I sang in tune.
I alienated other friends…
I love you people. I’m okay. I’m only sort of lying. Not enough to worry over. We’re all adults here.
If you look to the side of my blog (if you are on my blog and not reading this on some other sort of thing), you can see that I have Fetching Pink Hair. This makes me Happy.
I am having some snickky health problems that are making me Un-Happy. Ever since my concerning health problems of 2008, and then again the ones that I had over the last 2-3 years, I have assumed that every time I get a Weird Body Twinge – this time it is The Cancer. I am certain I will only dodge the bullet for so long and that soon my number will be up despite a fortune teller assuring me that I will be an old woman and also I am superstitious.
It has turned out to NOT be a huge problem it is a combination of Stress and Aging. I think that perhaps I am not really aging gracefully but am being dragged into my 40s kicking and screaming like a 6-year-old. This is not very seemly or dignified and I am going to try to do better and not holler and Carry On Cranky in the restaurant of life about not liking the Adult Menu of Destiny and that I would rather have the mac and cheese and Menu Crayons and also I don’t have to do what you say, Mr. Poopy Pants! So There, Underwear!
So when I get all wound up in this way I get all shrill and impossible to live with and I slurk around getting nothing done but worrying and obsession. This is unfortunate, because I just cowrote a cool song about a bounty hunter that is up at songfight by Billy and the Psychotics and you should go listen to the fight and vote for it and other good ones if you feel so inclined-plane. Even now, I am trying to review it today but I have gotten only halfway through them because when I write reviews of anything my documents are encyclopedias of aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa……
I have the relatively new iPhone (pictured) but have not turned on SIRI because I feel that she is creepy. Also, I have a sandwich that would like to be eaten. I know. It told me. Sandwiches are smart.
1. it is fine to fall asleep upon your couch, if you are a snake.
2. when a snake purchases a couch, s/he must get delivery. Also they require assssssisssssstanccccce with their wallet.
3. Another song will come out today. Well, probably many will, but I mean another Psychotics song. For now, it’s going to be the only way that I participate in the contests unless the song faeries scream at me. It’s time for other things to happen; time to finish things from before that have been left undone. I feel okay about this, because I tend to feel odd if I’m not actively involved in a Thing making new material. Like I’m killing a practice routine.
3b. I came back in here because one of the things I’m doing is that I’ve changed two of my old contest songs I dislike and made them into one song that I like more. Right now, it plays well live. Soon, I’ll do a decent demo. It may go on part of The Project. Teaser: I’m calling it ‘If I Had One more Time To Panic.’
4. I’ve been stuck in troubling practice cycles before. Practicing is good, but I once gave myself tendinitis. I was never as good. When you hurt a part from working it too hard, those muscles and other moving parts don’t trust as much again.
Sometimes when I practice, I can hear my body thinking “yeah, right…” and I feel myself tense up.
5. I’d be a looser and less tense performer if I were a snake. But this would be irrelevant. Snakes don’t have hands.
HAPPY NEW YEAR! It’s that time of year again, so here are some fun facts about Denise New Year! I hope you are having a good one, and having a good Monday during this special holiday sneezon!
1. October 1 is the Day of Denise New Year and April 1 is SuspiciousDen’s birthday! So they are 6 months apart! I tend to behave more foolishly in the Warmer Months so my Silly Self takes over. You know, or not
2. On every DNY, a major revelation is revealed. #mysssstery!!
3. I make 5 resolutions every year now on this day.
4. It’s cold in my living room.
5. We’re going out to dinner.
6. I’m so pleased at how much progress I’ve made in the last 12 months, personally. I couldn’t have done it without a couple of key people. They know who they are and they always show up for me.
7. I’ve been lying low lately.
8. Tomorrow I am going to the doctor. I will have more to say about that soon. I’ve needed to talk about that stuff, and get on with this business of my life for a long time. I will do what needs to be done, whatever they say. I have no idea what’s going on with me, truthfully, so I’ve been hanging out and laying low.
Meanwhile, here’s an old photo of the death star in Legos at the mall:
This has nothing to do with this post.
1. So. I’m here at blogathonatx (blogathonatx.com). I can assure you, I did not literally Blog My Own Face Off. To provide you with too much information, as is my way – I have this weird Thing on my chin and I had to get my father, a Nice Physician, to meet me at his office and he tried to deal with it. So I was late.
2. Honestly, I don’t think providing this information to you is indicitave of Savvy Blogging. The truth is, I am not really a very savvy blogger. Nor do I have a clear cut mission in life. What I do have is a domain and a Vague Plan. At some point, I will get things together. This will happen some time over the rest of the month.
3. How is this different than the rest of the times I have said these Sorts of Things, you may ask? Well, this time, I have a little green feeling. A little green feeling is a little different from the other colors. It’s a center of the rainbow go. It’s proof of progress but an indicator that there’s a lot to do to make headway in the future. It’s light at the end of the tunnel but you can see the trees waving around outside a little more clearly in the sunlight.
4. Do you know what I am talking about? No, you probably don’t. We are at a party and you have excused yourself to get punch even though your glass is full. This is the type of blogathon that this is turning out to be for me. There’s a lot of stimuli in the room and it’s really tempting to write stream-of-consciousness like a confessional. This is something that I used to do WAAAY back in the OlDen Days.
5. Now that I have taken you into the dark, nonsensical tunnel that is my thought-process; you are probably going “huh?” Truthfully, I can’t explain why I am a LOT more disorganized than I have been before. All I can say is that I’m irked that I am further away from the goals I wanted to be closer to; and I have found myself unable to give myself credit for a lot of the milestones I’ve hit. I think I need to do that. Being a Surly Individual is not going to help me find jumper cables for the spaceship – or stop writing extrodinarily bad metaphors … or learn to spell…or looking at people walking by my table with inviting expressions rather than with @suspiciousden in my eyes like they have tried to sell my spleen to circus performers.
6. So, at my dad’s clinic, my father asked me if there had been stink bugs. “Why?” I asked him. Because they hover around your face and put their P R O B I S C U I T S (not how the word is spelled) in it. these are called kissing bugs. There’s more information, like a doctor with a weird name and stuff. I’m going to dinner with him on Tuesday and we’re going to talk about bacteria and vile parasites of the face over a nice meal and then I will know terminology and stuff. I said “can I put you in my blog!?” thinking *people really need to know about this stuff!* and it’s true. I bet if you are reading this, you really want to know about what a lurking stinkbug can do to your face. So let my mistakes be a lesson to YOU.
7. Actually, we just moved. So yet again, I think it’s just hormones. I’m going to the Dude-You-Don’t-Wanna-Hear-About-It-Doctor on Tuesday as well, so I-May-Say-Something-General-And-Seemly about my Well Being, if you like.
This is the worst blog in a while, y’all. Fitting, as I’m having lunch at Blogathon. Flarg.