update-y mcFreak post.

1. I have been selected to participotato in a not really all that secret Thing. It’s like a compilation album. I am sure that my friend Brigitte London, a musician of the Outlaw Country persuasion, selected me because of my cleverness and ninja abilities, and not because of my glittering resume (even though I’m kinda-shiny-sometimes-aly). Nonetheless, I will endeavor to send them a somewhat bitchin’ track (this will be easy because I have been in song contests and especially songfighting – and My New Peers have been growling and insulting my work on a weekly basis so I am not worried about crumbling under professional scrutiny). It has just been a matter of which track. I have asked a few people, not too many, and have narrowed it down and (most likely) chosen one.
2. I am a little worried about my bio, although I sent it to my bud Jules and she said I look fine and gave me helpful hints. I will probably not tell dirty jokes in the bio, for example or mention @suspiciousden’s Dailybooth … so Jules is a good person to ask about these things because she knows how to bottle the creepy factor when need be (I’m sure she is enjoying this blog) … As far as where on earth these extremely well organized and professional people are going to be able to find me on the interwebs, since I am all over it like a bad rash, I may whine a little more:
3. Go to http://www.denisehudson.com. Go ahead. There’s nothing there, is there? Well, that’s pretty sad, isn’t it. This is because I have the internet aptitude of a three year old. This is why you are currently reading this poorly designed wordpress content here and not in a zippier, sexy location of my choosing – with mood lighting and incense and dancing boys and chocolate and internet squirrels bringing you virtual Courvoisier.

my website will be this smooth and fly. like Griffpig. The World’s Coolest Sunglasses.

But I am going to attempt to rectify this situation like RIGHT NOW since I own the place, meaning my name. I refused to Sell to Worthier Denise-s, no indeed – not at Any Price. But sadly, I know NADA-NADA-Enchaladda about such things.
4. But I can do it because I have many, many brain cells. Together they make AN ENTIRE BRAIN. So guess what goblins… I’m going to USE that brain to MAKE WEB HISTORY. And just LOOK OUT!!! Blogathon is NEXT MONTH! You know it!
5. However, I will probably be whining a LOT because we are also MOVING houses during this time when I suddenly have to make it seem like I have been an active member of the music community and not like I have just been sitting on my tuckus producing content.
6. Yes, I know I can use a Psychotics track for this compilation. Duh…..I should have gone as a Psychotic for Nur Ein, and for Halloween. We all know this. Flarg. This is HIGH on my list of consideration, seeing as this is my most Awesomeist of material and will Blend Best. Stay Tuna-ed.

I can’t even think anymore and there is pizza to be had. I will probably make and exciting google plus list later, and stalk the rest of the Honeys maniacally across the internet, becoming ever more intimidated with each passing click. I know that this is not The Point of camaraderie and fellowship and internet collaboration and that living in a tiny cave practicing my scales should come to an end. This will be good for me. I am an Upwardly Mobile Producer of Content and Country Musicians everywhere want me to go to their Barn Dances even though I came from the planet of Xondor. Yee-haw, y’all.

EXCUSES WITH FRIENDS: Part TWO

I am achieving MORE unrighteousness in the Words with Friends-friends game. I can only say I’m sorry, and offer these excuses, which are that they wouldn’t take these perfectly fine words which are good and great and are Spelt correctly. So don’t get out the rieth of legad and beat me with it. Flarg.
(see THIS previous entry for context CLUEZ)

GLOSSARY PT. 2 (via the XONDORIAN ROYAL INTERGALACTIC EMBASSY)
[not in alpha-bet-soup-ic-al order...]

lauuv
a more dastardly sort of trowel

pimay
a sure footed and lithe water bird with a long, beak that gets into absolutely EVERYBODY’s business.

le
yet ANOTHER note to follow sol,

Zitth
Xondor’s second moon. A Very Suspicious Place, indeed.

Quegad
both the plural and singular form of the mysterious rock creatures of Zitth

qued
a quorum of Quegad

li
yet ANOTHER drink with jam and bread.

biocene
the geological epoch in which bacterial life began to form

theel
a strange substance best not discussed.

vaceby
grandma abhors a vaceby.

bisec
the vein that runs across a well pumped gym member’s upper arm at a finer workout establishment

Vaces
flower arrangements with spy-eyes.

Theid
The ruling body of the Eomen (who are clarvoiant magic users)

Rieth
SEE “Legad”

Legad
a place of good spelling. See “The Rieth of Legad”

THE RIETH OF LEGAD
The stick that you hit people with who don’t spell real good.

ilmet
an ear-creature. but it’s not really gross or anything. no really. it sounds worse than it is.

Bitti
Legal trouble of the intergalactic sort.

xealew
a tuber similar to a potato, but purplish.
*****************************************

in conclusion, here is a photo of me getting all Nur Ein-y on everybody’s hiney. So LOOK OUT BELOW (i.e….where I am coming from!!!)

Nur Ein VII: Round Zero

1. And so it begins.
2. And not rather well.
3. I’m hoping it improves. I’m about to go try some piano-y stuff …
4. *deep dramatic sigh*
5. ps. this is a SUPER SECRET place this is on … so BE CAREFUL …. #sharplyindrawnbreath!

discipline

1. Moderation
2. Nutella
3. laundry :/
4. MEMORY !!!!!!!!!
5. tracks. today.
6. cleaning. finally.
7. nur EIN!!
8.

DISCIPLINE

9. filters
10. practice.

How to Cope with Being Accosted By Extroverts

1. Back away slowly. These are paradoxically both the oddest and most common of earthlings. They may flutter their Pom Poms in your face and begin chanting arbitrarily.
2. Allow them to explain the presence of “toros in the atmosphere.” Remember. A willing suspension of disbelief is key.
3. In more intimate settings, allow them to dominate the conversation.
4. Do NOT make them read beyond a third grade level.
5. DO try to check your ire, and perhaps learn what you can from their strange social practices. [NOTE: Apparently, one must engage in discourse with other humans in order to run the planet.]
6. Easily overpower them with memes and well placed social norms.
7. Set up conventions based around mutually shared areas of interest but hold secret meetings in closed session with discussion of how to take the planet’s power from the Loud and Ignorant.
8. Begin smear campaign based largely in well placed internet promotionals and other materials celebrating the casual quiet superiority of the Introvert; and decrying the drooling common idiocy of all who needily derive power from others to engage pathetically on a social level.
9. Watch society crumble.
10. Drink Jolt cola. Revel in success. Set up detention camps with mandatory times of “Quiet Reflection” and “Thoughtfulness Indoctrination.” Forbid any comparison to Godwin’s Law.
11. Celebrate new found power of introversion and your new dizzying popularity and the Era of the Subjugation of the Extrovert.
12. Organize a series of gladiatorial games to rid the earth of these aberrations once and for all!
13. Purchase Pom Poms.
14. Like … OMG! April Fools! I *totally* tested introvert on my TestyMcThing! Its @suspiciousden’s birthday, crazy-s!!! Get over yourselves!!!

I’m just trying to hang on till International Absentminded Sexy Professor in Latex Day, y’all. Shaaa…

EXCUSES WITH FRIENDS

I am behind in words with friends. This is because I am compiling a Dictionary of Unfairness. This is being posted here, and was also posted on my page at Facebook. not on my “official Facebook page,” which is sort of a shame, or even on my blog Facebook page, which honestly I don’t really know why I have one. I feel like I should produce Original Content for that, but the thought of this makes my earlobes wobble.

It doesn’t. But you believed me for a second….

Anyway… I’m sorry if you have to read this twice. Except, on reflection, I’m not really; I went back and rewrote this introduction so you the reader would know that I do very much Care. Also, I think reading a dictionary will do you a heap of good. It’s time to learn, goblins.
(I called y’all goblins on spacehook too – if there’s any Y’all here…)

WORDS WITH FRIENDS, UNFAIRNESS-ED they TOTALLY SHOULD HAVE COUNTED and WOULD HAVE on XONDOR my HOME PLANET.
(not necessecelery in order, because it doesn’t “go” as well that way.)

Adaht
similar to the tango

Heisune
phase of moon

Hemoni
a forest of mean, mean trees with bad attitudes.

Teele
one of the smaller units of Xondorian currency

Thule
a tool similar to a hammer and a chisel

Eleth
a tool often used in combination with the Thule.

Tuleh
a Courtship dance

Ethele
a non-reactive, and indeed, tasty and nutritious chemical compound native to Xondor which tastes of butter and chocolate. It nonetheless becomes flammable when combined with the milk of Earthling cows.

Leethe
A native Xondorian biped resembling a lavender colored ostrich with spindly legs and Rather Flat feet. With a long Slender neck like a giraffe and long floppy ears.

Leethi
The plural form of Leethe

Apa
a small colorful bird about the size of a cherry that lives symbiotically on the lush fur of the Leeth.

Peuma
How you bid farewell to a gambler who has won the Center Sweep. Never while either party’s back is turned.

Eomen
a guild of clairvoyant magic sages and tellers of fortunes making their home in and around the Squirkesian wetlands in strange, difficult to find houses.

Mapol
The proper term for a grouping of leethi
as in
… ‘a Mapol of Leethi migrating through the Great Hemoni during Second Triple Heisune is considered an auspicious sign by the Eomen.’

vonc
a light swear word, often used as a replacement for other more vulgar terms.

smoat
my husband says this is a carbohydrate attack. I think that’s a stretch

nohovump
when something is really quite a stretch

zive
a Baroque danse similar to the Sarabande, except that one can moonwalk to it.

epemey
the amused, yet mildly agitated apathy preceding feelings of truly affronted and pre-revolutionary Vigor and Zeal.

ps. I’m thinking of doing something with my notes, and perhaps even all these lists. we may discuss this, you (my adorking public) and I, (who am me (WHAT?!?)) on this here blogittyblogMCblogaDongaDingDong.

#putmeoutofmymisery.

Best Little Rest Stop in Kansas

We just stopped at the most amazing place. We knew the minute we saw the Elf Shelf that it was special. Not to mention the moomoo cowcow wind chimes Scoreza!!!

But there is always sadness in a palace of earthly delights. When covetousness hits, you must learn to restrain yourself and WALK AWAY!!! No matter HOW BAD you want the cutecute cupcake timer! Do I need anymore crap in my house?! No! No! A thousand times no!!!

So our visit with Travis Norris blessed me (here we are)…

(a photo where I don’t have 80chins, but Mr.Norris is still his photogenic self!)

..and I found a diet flavor of a Mountain Dew Adventure Flavor we’d been discussing over BBQ. It is called an ‘Adventure Flavor’ now because I decided it was

in conclusion, the consensus on Huey and his News – great band!!!!

Another cool Find

We have been cleaning our rooms and packing. Mike found in his room.

- The coolest pen of all time
-My watch which has been lost for like THREE YEARS
- the necklace I’m wearing
Another few things
-a postcard of Donald Roller Wilson‘s Mrs. Jenkin’s Late Night Dinner in Her Room Alone (While Out in the Hall Leading to Her Room, Her Small Friends Were Sleeping)

-some lyrics I wrote in 1997 or 1998:
(I’m slightly embarassed, but I’m going to type them anyway…)

Shimmying down the drainpipe
of your consciousness
Slipping out the back window
of your skewed mentality
Licking shrimp sauce from
the fingers of your innocence
This is a song about me

Well I went back down to
high school last night
Remembering that future
trip across the sea
This ain’t Euro Disney,
an opera, or a roller coaster
And I’m only gonna be what I will be

And I don’t give a rat’s ass
about the government
And they return the sentiment to me
They would illuminatti me
into oblivion
And gladly watch me bleed

The New Rules

1. Before you count your chickens, remember that you’re a vegetarian, albiet a “sh%$ty” one.
2. Remember over 15 songs that can’t be played are not worth 12 years of tears, no matter HOW good the tunes are. There’s no need to lather up, rinse off, or repeat such experiences.
3. Take small moments of fun where they are to be found. My gig was really fun tonight. I’m really grateful. If it’s easy, fun, and uncomplicated, I’m there with bells on.
4. The light at the end of the tunnel is at the end of the tunnel.
5. Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will, as it did ObiWan’s apprentice.
6. Oh wait, wrong movie!
7. Don’t %$%& with Mr. Zero.
8. (still not right movie, but closer, and wondering if my old roomate will ever read my blog).

That’s all I’ve got. Oh yeah, I said I was going last time. But I’m obviously a lying sack, aren’t I? I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying right here no matter what happens to me.

If I finish two projects like a good girl over tonight and tomorrow, and then another three things I have to do by early next week; I shall get a “sonic cookie” which means that everyone else does too. I’m really excited about it as well. So to a point, I do have to “go.”

A list of things You Didn’t Know About Me

1. There are actually Several Different taco songs
2. Tacos are not actually my favorite food.
3. I desperately want a Vibraphone. Or a marimba.
4. I can’t whistle in performance situations, because I will laugh.
5. Sometimes if I need to wear socks, and I don’t have matching ones … well … I just DON’T REALLY CARE
6. I’m not a neat person. I’m REALLY MESSY actually. Like not GROSS GROSS messy.

actually, I’m sorta lying. I’m not slovenly-ohcrap-she-needs-to-go-on-a-tv-show-messy … but I cause concern from time-to-time.

7. I don’t really use my Music Theory like I should. And I know a hella lot of it.
8. I don’t like coconut. Or the smell of it as a perfume or a lotion …

… unless it is REALLY hot and it’s sandy and everyone is half naked and oily on a beach and it’s in the form of suntan oil or something. Then, the smell of coconut is okay. But not unless it’s for that. I don’t really like it for cake or anything.

It’s good in rum too.

9. I like questions. Yay questions.
10. I like Dave. He beat me in Song Fu. Dave likes me too Go read his blog.

11. I don’t like ending on “ten”
12. So on that note, I’d like to say that I am WAAAAY behind on some things. Like sick-sick behind. It’s because I’ve been trying to make some connections with some people. I’ve been trying to be more social. I’ve been trying to crawl out of my little shell, both here online and also at home in real-life. But I have sacrificed working and practice. I still work a lot – but much of my mojo has been lost.

As a result, I’m going to have to gun it on some projects. So if I pop on to the places where I normally do and am not as … prolific as I’ve been, this time I am not avoiding anyone. You’ll see me when you see me and when you do this time I’ll be coming with some results. I’ve just been a little … overwhelmed for a few.